Husband funeral

[tyme]

Hey @Leeanne1 ,

I'm hearing your concerns about your children being there but they may not speak to you. These are very reasonable concerns. 

We have to remember that everyone has their own way of grieving. I cannot say whether they will or they won't speak to you. Whatever it is, know with an open heart that you will receive and accept them whenever they are ready to talk to you. 

Everyone has made mistakes in the past. Once they know this, it will be an eye-opener.

I hear you pain, your stress and your anxieties. We are here for you.

Thank you for trusting the community in reaching out at this vulnerable time.

@MJG017 @defaultusername @Alisse may also be able to share their insights.

[MJG017]

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@Leeanne1 wrote:

Thanks I will try to take care of me but I'm very stressed out about the funeral 😞

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@Leeanne1  Of course you're stressed, anyone in our position would be and anyone would understand how stressed and upset you are right now.

Hopefully everyone there will be willing to talk to you and you can all support each other.  I know one thing people have told be recently (since I've been trying to be more open with people the past 18 months) is that often they took my silence and keeping to myself as I didn't want to be disturbed or anyone to talk to me.  So if anyone doesn't talk to you at the funeral then maybe they're just not sure if they should or they just feel uncomfortable to.  So if you want to talk to them, don't be afraid to go up to them and talk to them.  Funerals do tend to be times where people do come together in a shared grief so i really hope that you'll be able to all come together and any past issues can remain in the past. 

Also remember that if someone doesn't talk to you at the funeral, they may just be to upset to, so it's doesn't mean they, or you, can't talk once the funeral is over and some time to recover from it has passed.

Hopefully you are correct in thinking you're reading too much into things and you can all grieve together and support each other.  Until then, we're all here for you Leeanne.

[Leeanne1]

@MJG017 

I feel so sick not feeling hungry 😭😭😭

[tyme]

Heya @Leeanne1 ,

Have you ever spoken to Griefline? I vaguely remember sharing the contact details with you in the past.

I recognise how hard things are for you right now. Please be gentle with yourself.

[MJG017]

I'm sorry @Leeanne1.  I wish I could do more to help you.  Try to eat or drink something, otherwise you'll just feel worse.  I know it's not easy right now, but even a biscuit or two or a cuppa will help.  Even calling one of the crisis lines, just to talk to another person and hear someone's voice might help.  They are there to help people in all sorts of difficult situations.  Can you get yourself to do something to distract yourself, like reading a book or doing a crossword?

[Leeanne1]

@MJG017 

 I crochet alot and spend time with mum every day. 

[Leeanne1]

@tyme 

No I haven't I rather to to my counselor. But if I need to I will call the grief line. 

[Terri1]

Sorry for your loss. If you are struggling to eat make sure you are having a juice or cup of tea and try having something light with it even a cup of soup might be more manageable. 
I hope the day is a beautiful celebration of your husband’s life and that your worries are eased the moment you see your children. Take care and breathe deeply you’ll get through this. 

[Leeanne1]

i felt so left out yesterday I found it difficult to cop with the way I was forgotten about I wasnt mentioned in the start of the funeral .hardly any photos of me it was more a tribute of his life . I'm finding this difficult to deal with I'm angry with my children making me feel like the bad one 😫😫

[rav3n]

Hey @Leeanne1 so sorry to hear that you felt left out at the funeral yesterday, I can't imagine the mixed feelings you must've felt. I hear that you're feeling angry about the photos, totally makes sense that you'd want more pictures with you husband - have you had a chance to share this with your children? Hopefully it wasn't intentional. 

As hard as it must've been, you made it through a difficult day yesterday. You got through it 💙