Lived Experience Forum

[outlander]

its ok @Former-Member its really just another day and i want to be here for you
what has happened with your family.. can you give a little more context?

[Former-Member]

I phoned a male member of my family who supported me when I had my spinal operation. I phone for his Birthday, 10/10/2018, but he never answered, so I left him a message. I spoke to him  at his work place, when I phoned a second time 2 days later & he was rude to me for phoning him  at work. It was only 7:30am I thought I would talk to him before he went to work. I asked him did he have a nice B/Day & he told me no he did not & he would phone me when he was at home.

He never phoned me so I let it go.  I decided to phone him because I was worried about him today, & he treated me like I was trash. Some sort of idiot, & I blocked his p/n on my phone now & I cried!! I decided not to let any more of my family members treat me like trash again so I blocked their phone numbers, now I am all alone once again, & what happened with D recently just made me so low & messed up now!

@outlander 

[outlander]

wow @Former-Member what an awful way to be treated but it says more about him then it does about you. hes the one with the problme not you!

[Former-Member]

Yes, I know you are rite, it's just so belittling to be treated like an idiot when all I was doing was showing my love & care. I have to let these people (my family) go as they do not treat me with repect, & maybe its because I am unwell?

I hate my life most days, I have these Fur Babies that love me. I tried with D, & got shocked at him flirting with me while telling me he's getting married soon. Its messing my head up, & then I I feel like a BIG loser!!

@outlander

[outlander]

it is horrible @Former-Member i know how you wuold be feeling, i get treated like this quite often. your not the looser, they are. i can never see you bein horrible to someone else esp for ringing to be checked up on, it shows they are the ones with the problem not you, its got nothing to do with being well/unwell.
i know its not the same as offline but i do love you, i totally get the isolation. i feel very isolated too even if im around people. maybe you could put your craftyness to good use and organise some bracelet making sesisons or something at your house? or at a local free community hall nd advertise that way as well. i would be a good way of getting out of the house and meeting some new people with the chance of making some friends too..

[Former-Member]

I would love to be successful at something, & make some money again. I just get dark thoughts, & moods, & when this happens, I lose myself for a while, if you know what I mean? Sometimes adds on TV upset me so much, they are always the ones about having Insurance for when we pass on. They make me think I may die soon from all this damage & pain in my body. When I get like that, I think I need some family to support me, but if I tell them I feel like that, they may do something to try & take away my free will. Remember I am a MHW, I have seen these things happen, & its real. I hope I am not triggering you in any way @outlander ?  I may have been too open with you, sorry XO

[outlander]

no, your not triggering me @Former-Member just nodding along in agreement with what you say.
yes those sorts of ads and all the horrible news on tv is the reason i no longer watch it unless im actually watching something like the big bang theory and then i just mute the adds nd jsut flick a quick look after a few minutes.

and yes i totally get needing family support but having that fear. i didnt get that comforing response either, quite the opposite. maybe you could just start small with family like sending msg to a few and jsut talk about how they are. people tend to like talking about themselves to start with and then maybe after a little bit you could invite them around for coffee or something. small steps can work really well even though it can be frustrating as its not right now.

[Former-Member]

I so comforted that I could be open with you, & you understand where I am coming from, it took a lot to open up like that with you believe me. 🙂 xo

I feel like I live in a bubble here, & no one else knows what its like, & if I tell anyone, they will think I am so crazy, or a hypochondriac. My goodness I feel liter now getting that off my chest!I will work it out, maybe the SMS idea sounds good, thank you I appreciate your care & your love & friendship more than you will ever know! xoxoxo

@outlander

[outlander]

thank you for being ok with being open with me @Former-Member im not here to judge you, not at all. i already wear the crazy label, you can come and join me if you want! we can start a club 😉

[Former-Member]

Sounds like FUN! count me in! 

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