I can’t cope

[Captain24]

Hi @tyme 

You have awesome friends! It was suggested to me yesterday to cook up a couple of meals and freeze them so I eat healthier. 

Im having pasta bake and chips. I’m sure chips count as veggies! Then a hot chocolate too. I don’t think the temp made double digits at all today. 

Community guide sounds interesting when I can finally climb out of here. Just need more confidence but not sure if I’d be worthy or good enough. 

I get home from work between 7:40 and 8. After leaving at 5:30 so it’s a big day. 

But today was actually good I felt partially normal. I still feel tired and drained but a little lighter and I’m hoping that is from finally getting some help. So here is hoping to onwards and upwards!

💕 Captain24

[tyme]

Most definitely @Captain24 - it's onwards and upwards (plus a few rounds and rounds lol).

Actually, research shows recovery is supported with connection and a sense of belonging. Hence, by reaching out, you are actually supporting your recovery. 

You probably need an early night tonight because you've got another big day tomorrow, right?

Hugs, tyme

[Captain24]

No @tyme no more rounds and rounds. I still have a sick feeling in the bottom of my stomach with how close I came.I don’t want to go back there! I did get some help yesterday for if I do though. 

I do feel so much support here though. It’s good to know that it will help. 

Yes another big day tomorrow. I’ll probably go to bed around 10. I’m still struggling with sleeping but I guess in time that will improve. Hopefully! 

Hope you had a great day

[tyme]

Hey @Captain24 ,

I think it's good to be realistic about mental health. There are the ups, there are the downs and by nature, you will have the round and rounds! Being prepared allows you to be proactive so that you can see what's ahead and nip it in the bud! That's how I survive now.

I did have a good day. Well it ended a good day. I started off a real grump because my plans and schedule had been changed due to unforeseen circumstances. I was complaining all morning. In the end, I accepted (although grudgingly), and I felt I was able to push myself to do things I didn't want to do. It wasn't bad or anything - I just didn't plan for it! Lo and behold, I ended up being proud of myself that I didn't give in to defeat. As well as that, I actually enjoyed the change.

So there you go. A typical day in my life. But ultimately, I do feel good about tackling the challenges that come my way. It shows growth. Ten years ago, I would've thrown in the towel and just walked off.

I'm learning along with everyone else here. I find being stagnant in life is boring. LOL.

Thank you for reading/listening 🙂

What was your victory today?

tyme

[Captain24]

Thank you so much for sharing your day @tyme! I appreciate it and You should be proud.

I’m you 10 years ago I would have given up. You have just given me more hope. 

Im hoping that I learn how to cope better with the ups, downs and round and rounds. At the moment I don’t think I can but I guess it will come in time. 

I don’t really have a victory just that I managed to have a good day. That is a victory in itself though. I did make it until 5 before I started to get irritated but didn’t let it get to me.

💕

[tyme]

That IS your victory @Captain24 ! Having a good day, making it to 5pm, pushing through. That's many victories!

For some, getting out of bed is a victory. For others, getting out of the house is a victory.

It's important to set small achievable goals according to where we are currently at. For example, I wouldn't be able to step into your shoes and wake at 4:30am, and work through to 7pm or so. That will take time to work towards.

I'm not if others do this, but I play 'games' with myself and always want to beat my personal best. For example, felt angry about a certain situation, next time, I'd self-talk to help me do it differently the next time.

Self-talk is incredibly powerful. It can make you sink to despair, or it can empower you to reach every mountain top. Now it is about you working with the voice of self-talk to better yourself.

Hugs, tyme

[Captain24]

That playing games is quite ironic @tyme . When I noticed myself starting to get irritated at 5 I though woo hoo I’m usually irritated past the point of controlling it by 3!

The hours aren’t really a big deal to me in my ‘normal’ moments as I used to work in management in retail and the hours were ridiculous and sometimes 14 days straight. I did this for 20yrs.  So this a breeze when I’m in a good place.

I do need to stop being so hard on myself and look for the little wins not just the big picture. 

I’ve got a long way to go with the self-talk.(I am working on it)  For as long as I can remember it has 90% of the time been critical. 

I guess I should go and try and get some sleep. 

Have a good night and great day

💕

[tyme]

You too @Captain24 . Have a good sleep and I'll catch up tomorrow.

tyme

[tyme]

Hey @Captain24 ,

When you're ready, I've got a heartful hot cocoa waiting.

tyme

[Captain24]

Hey @tyme 

I definitely need that today! 

How as your day?