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25-10-2018 05:42 PM
25-10-2018 05:42 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
There is so much to deal with having a partner with mental illness. I am usually very supportive of people who suffer, but also had to leave a relationship with someone who had diagnosis of schizophrenia and not doing the work re the illness. When in triggering situations or episodes it often too difficult to have much influence, illnesses will run their course, best take a long term view.
Recently I had a BiPolar diagnosis and I do plenty of research and certainly dont use it as an excuse not to contribute to my living environment. I do all work and bills.
It is important to take the time to figure out the right balance in our individual relationships and you do care. There are times when it is important to call things out. I am getting there with my son.
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25-10-2018 10:52 PM - edited 25-10-2018 10:53 PM
25-10-2018 10:52 PM - edited 25-10-2018 10:53 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
@AppleblossomI just had a little quiet sook to myself just then about the whole car episode this week - funny how relieved I feel after letting a few tears out... I guess the learning will never stop
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25-10-2018 11:22 PM
25-10-2018 11:22 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
I can understand how frustrating it would be, when you are trying to do the right thing, and it seems as if she does not care, but she did at least do work when she could.
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02-11-2018 08:57 PM
02-11-2018 08:57 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
How are things @Sophie1
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02-11-2018 09:59 PM - edited 02-11-2018 10:05 PM
02-11-2018 09:59 PM - edited 02-11-2018 10:05 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
Hi @Former-Member
Thx for checking in - it’s been a difficult week with more strange patterns within day ... My partner has been busy in garden and running errands during day and zombie exhausted again in evening time - appears drunk like clumsy , no memory of it the next day or of anything discussed or agreed in evenings when she is like that ... I find it distressing to see her like this and that it’s so regular
she saw psychiatrist this week - he said it’s normal side effect for her meds and she needs to be aware of this ... but Also he said it’s partly because she is so unfit and trying to do too much ... she has agreed not to drive at night for now and I took bus home all week from work ... I’m a little anxious as we are visiting interstate her family for 5 days and they are the usual stressful group of folk complaining about each other incessantly to us ... I don’t think they realise how fragile my partner is and I really want to make sure I keep an eye on her and protect her
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03-11-2018 09:08 AM
03-11-2018 09:08 AM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
The driving is a tough one
*sighs* catching the bus another adjustment.
One thing I did find helpful when visiting family was rather than hanging about at home, we would go somewhere - do day trips or other fave things, meet friends or relies for lunch at a nice cafe, go clothes shopping, look in antique shops, op shops etc.
Holidays are difficult for Mr D and our last few trips have been awful - he would come to bed anxious and crying, no intimacy, little joy. We have a 3 day break booked soon in the hope that the shortness of it will make a difference but am thinking even this might be optimistic. 😢
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03-11-2018 09:36 AM
03-11-2018 09:36 AM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
The shortness of break for you and Mr D may help ... we came across a 4 day rule with relatives where first 4 days are always the best and after that it seems to descend into tension and arguments ... it does always seem to hold true
Oh and last night just before bed my partners mum have me instructions on what to say to the other siblings and dinner tonight regarding the dads mental state and medication ... I really don’t think it’s
My place to interfere - and if she wants to speak to them about it she should do it herself - I am deeply uncomfortable about parroting her words with no belief or understanding on my part ... sigh ... I will conveniently forget to bring it up
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03-11-2018 09:56 AM
03-11-2018 09:56 AM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
Had not heard of the 4 day rule before but will certainly bear it in mind when planning trips.
Hope time away goes well for you.
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12-11-2018 09:03 PM
12-11-2018 09:03 PM
Re: she’s damaged the car again - what should I do ?
@Sophie1 was thinking of you and your Sophietta today as Mr Darcy has been going hammer and tongs wanting to get our garden into shape. He can't tell a plant from.a weed and today needed to be around for quality control.
Am not sure if he is rapid cycling, having withdrawals or is on his way to relapse as he is discontinuing a drug due to adverse events (is still on one med).
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12-11-2018 10:11 PM
12-11-2018 10:11 PM