Schizoaffective disorder and just getting by

[Jade30]

Hi all, does anyone have Schizoaffective disorder out there? Mine’s really, really horrible: treatment resistant and I’ve had it for 21 years. I don’t have lack of motivation, I’m highly motivated but I suffer a lot of fatigue and have been hit hard the last few years by a number of setbacks: physical illness and florid psychotic manic episodes. I just wanted some encouragement that I do enough each and every day just getting by. I think we are al too hard on ourselves, particularly with the recovery model that therapists use. Some of us just won’t recover to our original lives after setbacks and that’s ok. I’ve done a uni degree, I’ve worked a bit but I’ve pushed myself to breaking point over and over. I’ve had about 25 episodes in 21 years and my illness is also chronic. Anyway, I just wanted some reassurance and I wanted to reassure others with schizoaffective disorder that it is one of the toughest out there. The way my moods interact with my psychotic symptoms and set each other off is so painful. Whatever we accomplish each day is enough 🙂

[Eden1919]

@Jade30  Hi, I have schizoaffective disorder as well and i am also treatment resistant it can be horrible at times and is so exhausting i find i struggle to do basic everyday tasks and it just gets harder and harder as time goes by no matter what i do. you are right we really do need to be more kind to ourselves because often just existing is hard enough. welcome to the forums. 

[tyme]

Hi @Jade30 - welcome to the forums.

It sounds like you are very proactive about your recovery. For many, MH just becomes part of life. Quality of life is not about the absence of MH conditions or health conditions, but the ability to live and thrive.

I hear you have pushed through and accomplished much in your life. Are there things you can do to increase your energy (if you don't do it already) such as regular exercise, healthy eating, socialising?

I live with a number of MH conditions, and yes, they do set me back sometimes. However, it do not let it get the better of me. When I'm feeling very low, that's when I connect with others - like what you have done.

[StuF]

@Jade30 

I love your whole post, but the last sentence says it all 🙂

I too am diagnosed as schizoaffective, but I'm fortunate in that my treatment is relatively successful. Having said that, you have achieved a lot despite of it...more than myself in some ways.

But this is not a comparison. I just wanted to welcome you to the forums. You've found a great place. I look forward to seeing you around

[Jade30]

@Eden1919   I have found a fellow sufferer, yay! I haven’t met many of those who’ve suffered schizoaffective disorder outside hospital! It’s so hard isn’t it. Thanks for understanding. My psychiatrist and family and a few close friends understand the struggle so I’m glad I have them but there’s no easy fix and it’s not that we’re ever being negative, it’s just reality!! Hope you’re having some good moments today and some quiet in your mind-my mind is so active with symptoms!!! Take care 🙂

[Jade30]

Oh no @tyme you don’t understand, I’m in a good spot right now. Treatment-resistant illness is a different thing entirely. And pushing through is not something I’d advise for anyone with schizophrenia/bipolar/schizoaffective disorder.

And you also don’t understand my level of fatigue. It’s like chronic fatigue syndrome.

Your comments have upset me. Please try and understand everyone’s mental illness is different and some people’s illnesses are a lot more severe than you’d ever imagine!

[tyme]

HI @Jade30  - I'm sorry and apologise for upsetting you. I did not mean to at all.

I am speaking from my experience and am no way saying you should feel like that. 

Once again, I'm very sorry.

[Jade30]

@StuF Thanks for the welcome!!! 

Im glad treatment for you is relatively successful 🙂

I think we all have a lot to learn from each other so I’m very glad I’ve found this forum!!

I look forward to more conversations 🙂

[Jade30]

No worries, thank you for the apology @tyme 

I’ve had very awful experiences with counsellors, psychologists and psychiatrists who say things similar to what you have said without digging deeper. I think the most important thing to remember is that you can’t simplify mental illness. Mental illness is as complex as the people it inhabits. 

[tyme]

Most certainly @Jade30 - there is no one size fits all to MH. 

It is looking at the person as a whole?