Lived Experience Forum

[ArraDreaming]

Hey so yeah to keep it short I have struggled for a really long time with my mental health it's been a really long journey, I have been really well for ages now, years, with only a blip here and there. But I feel so fucing guilty when I slip up. At the minute I'm struggling a bit, but I shouldn't be. I shouldn't be struggling, I shouldn't be mad, THIS IS NOT OK. 
I am meant to be doing well. I am meant to be fine!! But I'm not! But I will keep saying I am to people because I am supposed to be ok now, I was doing well. This getting angry bs is old me. I'm not like that anymore so why am I mad! I thought I was past this. I want to not post this because I want everyone to beleive that I am ok because I should be but I'm going to beceuse I can't stop thinking about how bad it is that I'm not doing well  

[ArraDreaming]

And nobody is bloody listening to me either today

[pisces_1]

Hey Jay95, I'm sorry you're feeling so distressed at the moment, but it's really good you're able to reach out in this space.
If you need to, please don't hesitate to reach out for some one to one support e.g. (Lifeline : 13 11 14 or Suicide Call back: 1300 659 467). We're here for you!

[ArraDreaming]

I’m fine.

[NiteKat]

Hi Jay95

Thank you for posting your thoughts tonight. And its good to know that youre feeling ok right now. Keep in touch.

NiteKat (mod)

[HappyCastle]

Good morning @ArraDreaming.

I really relate to your post and wanted to let you know that I am here, and I am listening.

I can relate to the frustration and anger when I have been well for a long period and then I'm not. I remember going into panic mode and resisting it so much for similar reasons, I wanted people to think that I was ok, I wanted ME to think that I was ok. 

I think talking through these things can be really helpful. Especially once you can admit to yourself that you're not coping it becomes easier to think about next steps.

You mentioned you were well for a really long time. In the past when you had your blips, can you think of some of the things that helped you get to the other side? I know myself how hard it is to see that other side when we are in the thick of things. But the fact that you have been there before, and got well again is a good reminder that we CAN get to the other side again.

[ArraDreaming]

Maybe this is just me wanting to Convince everyone that I am ok I don’t know, but it’s really not that bad

[ArraDreaming]

I’m just stressed

[ArraDreaming]

Thanks @HappyCastle  i will be ok, I'm just stressed, I'm working myself to the ground and my patience is wearing really thin and I hate that 

[HappyCastle]

I hear you. Trying to fit at least one nice thing for yourself in there is really important too. Speaking of which, I'm going to make myself a tea with lots of honey. Hope you have something little like that that gives you a bit of relief. 

Take care