I recently had my birthday. I went to stay with one daughter and then we both went to the other daughter's house to celebrate my birthday with lunch and cake for the three of us. I am 57 now.
I have not had a party for my birthday since I was 6.
I get a present from one daughter each year and if I am lucky the 2nd daughter buys me something. My husband used to just surprise me with a present throughout the year sometime. He is not a fan of birthdays, especially his own. His 74th Birthday is today.
I lived on celebrations for many years until my kids got to their teens and became very demanding, wanting things I simply could not afford. Then it just became a sense of failure all the time.
Celebrations had given me something to look forward to and now I dread birthdays.
Having something to look forward to was what kept me going.
The same happened with Christmas. No one would help with decorations, planning, cooking, cleaning before or after, it was all left to me and it became a dreadful time of year. I feel like my family stole my happiness by stealing the celebrations.
I really resent them for that because now, at best I feel flat around special occasions.
They are all grinches except one. Terri still celebrates with me. Terri has a severe brain injury. Her sister just wants presents and at 33 she shows her disgust if I get it wrong.
My son's birthday is in two days time. I am not allowed to have contact with him or his family, My eldest daughter has 8 children and I am not allowed contact with her or her children her birthday was four days before mine. My eldest son, Anthony died a month before Christmas and his biirth day is a month after so Christmas was always very difficult for me, but I made it a real celebration so the family could focus on happiness. Now I am left with just the hurt that drags on from his death anniversary to his birthday with nothing in between.
Sorry I guess I got carried away. but I don't get to talk about this as no one wants to hear it.
Terri and I celebrate one another's birthdays.
