I think you are under-valuing yourself @MJG017 

As I said previously, you have done much more than just the epic amount you have achieved in the last 12 months

You've had all those years of helping people with IT and helping them purchase the right equipment for the right reasons.

You've had your relationship for over a decade. You have a house.

As you know, but probably can't see right now, many people in the world, including many on the forums, have not had children, are not partnered, may never have been or never will be partnered. I am one of those people, so I really see much of myself in what you have written. I could say I've never started a support group. Each person has their own journey in life. 

You could be seen in the media on a wanted poster, at least being the face of a fund and awareness campaign is a positive use of your image.

Many people have had Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) you can look it up and do a test. Many people feel they have “done” little with their lives, some have mostly done negative things. This is definitely not you.

Also, you now know, that you were not rejected, but societal pressures at the time, meant you didn’t grow up with your biological mother. As I’m sure you know from support groups, many people born before mid 70s to single mothers experienced the same situation.

You can grieve that long experience now, it’s not too late. Perhaps a MH professional can help you with that grieving process.

I think, only by putting your own MH needs first, can you have a positive outcome, but that will look different for each person. Being on the forums in some shape or form may be part of that, but it doesn’t have to be either.

I do exactly the same thing with overthinking and feel preparation is important, but maybe it’s not. I think that’s a trust issue, to be able to trust that things will be okay. In the last few years I have also been more reactive to even small stressors and I am trying to let go of that, this has been helped by retiring, because there is less overall stress and mostly it’s stress I put on myself, so it’s not needed at all.

Lived Experience is so important and only now being recognised and give the credence it deserves just ask @tyme.