@chibam 

About "nice" not being enough or fixing things, I certainly did not mean they should be rude or abusive, but fake nice plastered over communication in real life or online can be very offputting, about the genuineness of the person ... eg ... today I got an email that had hope you had a nice day plus emoji ... when I had told them I was physically sick ... Covid like .... I am not as patient about such stuff as I used to be ... oh thats just automatic ... or the way nice people talk ... no ... I do not think so ... mind you for a long time I was not sure what a nice person was, so I reserved judgment about whether it was fake or not ... but getting older and wiser ...