@Dreamy the not knowing when those thoughts are gonna ease off makes it more overwhelming, hey. it's like, if there was some sorta timeline and we knew that after X days it would defs get a bit better, it would make the whole process a lil less stressful. 

the only thing i know, is that the pain, the overwhelm - it won't last forever. fingers crossed the thoughts ease up soon though. besides colouring, has anything else been helpful in calming or distracting from those thoughts?