Send 'smooth-sailing' sentiments to Spirit_Healer!

[Ru-bee]

Good morning @Spirit_Healer how are you feeling today? How has your conversation been sitting with you?

[Jynx]

@Spirit_Healer yaaay new thread!! 

Yeah how'd you go? Hope the convo was productive!!

[Spirit_Healer]

Hey @Jynx @Ru-bee @tyme @Blackcloud @Oaktree @Shaz51,

It was a much-needed conversation on my part. It gave me closure.

We talked about:

• me being the initiator of all the intimacy and messaging and how one-sided the relationship was
• us being incompatible due to both of our avoidance and anxiety - he refused to admit he has a DSM-V-diagnosable Anxiety disorder
• his trauma as a result of the death of his mother
• and how he threw me away when I turned from 'strong' woman to 'weak' woman
• him ghosting me for 8 weeks - he tried to negotiate it down to 6
• knowing when to give up on his dream career, given that he's in his mid-thirties now

He said he had never heard such frustration from me before. I told him that this was because I had never opened up to this degree with him before. He reflected that he could hear that I was 'hurt'. I should've told him that 'hurt' is an understatement, but I didn't want to guilt-trip him further.

I told him: "I don't know if we can even be friends, you treated me so badly".

At the end, he said "Let's keep this conversation going."

I think he won't be surprised if I don't.

What's the point of so anxiously wanting to hear from me, when he never even initiated any messages mid-week while we were together?

@creative_writer @BPDSurvivor @The-red-centaur @Just @PeppyPatti @Healandlove @Glisten @MJG017 @Former-Member @rav3n 

[Glisten]

@Spirit_Healer are you tired?

I’d be wreaked after that. 

[rav3n]

@Spirit_Healer i'm so proud of you for having this convo with him! even though the outcome might not have 100% been what you wanted, the fact that you opened up and stood up for yourself is such a big step. i can imagine its probably frustrating having to negotiate with him as well, i hope you were able to get some self-care in after that call! i agree with @Glisten i'd be pretty exhausted after a convo like that! 

[creative_writer]

@Spirit_Healer that sounds like a lot to have to cope with. Sending you hugs 💖🫂

[Former-Member]

@Spirit_Healer well done for being so open with him. I'm glad you were able to get so much out and I hope that it's helped you. I know it may not be the outcome you were after but I hope it's brought you some peace. 

I'm so proud of you. Sending you lots of healing love ❤️ 

[Spirit_Healer]

Thanks, everyone, @Former-Member @creative_writer @rav3n @Glisten @Jynx @tyme for your support!

Look at this watercolour I painted in Art Group yesterday (02/02/2025) and decided to gift to my psychiatrist when he next sees me. It's called 'Beach in Auckland', based on a photo I took in September, 2023. I also wrote a letter on the back. I hope he appreciates it!

@Shaz51 @Oaktree @BPDSurvivor @The-red-centaur @Just @Ru-bee @Healandlove @MJG017 @PeppyPatti @Blackcloud 

'Beach in Auckland', painted by Spirit_Healer on 02/02/2025

[Just]

@Spirit_Healer Nice, I like the beach too. 

[Former-Member]

That's absolutely beautiful @Spirit_Healer . I'm sure he will definitely appreciate it ❤️